Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Anger Management Brisbane

Anger Management is the most common problem that men come to see me about. They will either come to see me directly about it or will be forced by a partner, mother, brother etc to see someone about it. Or it will be a sub-issue. For example, they will see me for anxiety or depression but anger management problems are beneath the surface.

So yeah, Anger Management is a real problem for Men in today's society. Why? I don't believe Men know how to or believe that they are allowed to express their anger appropriately. Men believe that they are not allowed to get annoyed, upset, pissed off or just can't say no. Some believing that it might freak people out. So they don't say anything and the anger brews and then one day it all comes out. How do most men deal with not being able to express themselves? Alcohol and lots of it.

N.B., I remember when I was at school (I went to an all-boys school). The worst thing that you could say to someone was 'get cut'. Meaning you have got too angry and there was no return from that comment for some reason and you automatically lost the argument or conversation and looked like an idiot. So from an early age boys are taught not to express any anger, annoyance at all.

The trick is assertiveness or in organisational speak, how to have difficult conversations. It is about 'nipping things in the bud' early on before it becomes an issue. A little bit of confrontation is not a bad thing in a relationship, a friendship, at work and generally in life. Or saying NO! Keeping the peace is overrated and doesn't always work in the end.

Honesty and forthrightness are values that a lot of males have and want to live by. And that is what life is about, living your life by your core values, whatever they are. It is when we move away from these core values or don't live in alignment with them that psychological problems start occurring. Pretty simple really.

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